George and Sam: Two Boys, One Family, and Autism — by Charlotte Moore
Charlotte Moore is the mother of three sons, George, Sam and Jake. George and Sam both seem bright and healthy as babies, but eventually their behavior raises questions and first George, and then Sam are diagnosed as autistic. Jake, born after his older brothers’ diagnosis, is neurotypical, not affected by autism.
This book is both more personal and less so than most of the personal narratives on this topic. It’s definitely a mother’s story, with far more detail on daily life for Moore’s family. She lives alone with the boys on her family farm in the English countryside, in the old house she grew up in, an idyllic life greatly disrupted by her demanding sons. Disrupted, but also enhanced by her sons, who are much-loved and appreciated for their own special qualities. Moore makes it clear that, unlike many parents of autistic children, she does not believe that there’s a normal child somehow locked inside the autism. George and Sam, she tells us, are autistic through and through. It’s who they are, and she accepts them as they are.
Moore describes the details of her family’s domestic life, including what they wear, what they eat, what they like, dislike and fear, and how they play. As a former Children’s Librarian and ESL teacher, one of the things I found most interesting was her detailed observations of their speech patterns at various stages, and their relationship to different books and videos. You seldom get this level of specific detail, and I admire her close attention and interpretation, which reminded me of Cushla and Her Books by Dorothy Butler. It reminded me of how important books can be in the life of a child, and how specific books may appeal to a particular child for any number of personal, idiosyncratic reasons.
Moore also describes the different problems her boys pose, and her efforts to find treatments and educational options for them. She’s pragmatic and honest about her efforts — she tries many options, some of which work for one boy or the other, and some of which don’t. And, as she notes several times, you never really know what actually works, because you don’t know what would have happened if you had made other choices. She doesn’t present herself as perfect, and indeed it’s easy to criticize some of her choices. For example, I understand the problems she has getting her sons to eat a healthy, balanced diet, but I was appalled and disgusted at the amount of junk food and candy she makes available.
But then again — I never had to face the problems she deals with, something I had to think about on nearly every page. I found this book more interesting than most of the others I have read, thanks to the large amount of domestic detail, and her ability to maintain a positive attitude and sense of humor in very difficult circumstances.
Links :
- George and Sam: Two Boys, One Family, and Autism — Library Journal review by Corey Seeman
- An Extreme Aloneness — A negative review by Carolyn See, Washington Post, December 8, 2006
Pursuits: Elizabeth Thomsen 